Smoking Cannabis Helps Me Be A Better Mom To My Autistic Son

By: Jackie Greenberg

I had smoked cannabis as a teenager and a bit as an adult but eventually just stopped. I got married, had a baby and moved to Colorado from California.

Obviously Colorado has been known for its medicinal use of cannabis but mostly its recreational use of cannabis. In early 2018, I had to quit my job as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) to stay home and take care of our son.

During that time, my anxiety and depression kicked into overdrive because I wasn’t working anymore and also because I had been working overnight shifts so my sleep schedule was out of wack.

I tried melatonin, only to have these horrific nightmares. I cut out caffeine to no avail. I would stay up 3-4 days at a time just walking around our apartment restlessly and anxiously.

And the anxiety only increased when I would see the sun rising, knowing my son was going to get up soon and I hadn’t slept a wink. My son was about 2 and a half and hadn’t started talking so our days were filled with lots of screaming on his part and lots of crying on both of our ends from sheer frustration.

At this point, my husband saw how badly I was struggling emotionally and mentally, he suggested I try cannabis. I was hesitant because I remember how paranoid it had made me a couple times when I was younger.

I first tried indica edibles at 5 mg. About a couple months after I started using edibles, my son was diagnosed with Autism, which explained his severe speech delay among other things.

I felt so incredibly guilty and just a ton of pressure. My thought process was I can’t possibly take care of my special needs son while using cannabis products. What will people think?

I think the stigma behind it worried me. After some time, my depression, anxiety and insomnia came back and I was back to square one. I decided to give cannabis products another try.

I started using indica edibles again, but this time taking 10mg. I also began experimenting with cannabis strains. I had tried dank commander, gorilla cookies, space dawg to name a few.

I definitely need the head and body high in order to relax otherwise my anxiety creeps in.

I usually smoke a bowl with my bubbler in the evening when my son’s bed time is near. After he’s gone to bed I take an edible so I can relax and get myself ready for bed.

In total I take maybe 20 mg of cannabis to really feel fully relaxed and without a care in the world, which is incredibly hard for me to feel at all.

Bedtime tends to be incredibly stressful for people with autism because its hard for them to turn their brain off. Being high helps me be more patient and laid back instead of stressing over my son not wanting to sleep or how late it’s getting.

Cannabis relaxes me and in turn relaxes him. I have started therapy to help cope better but continue to use cannabis to help me turn my brain off, relax calmly and sleep throughout the night.

My relationship with my son and husband has gotten better. I’m more understanding and a lot less on edge with both of them (my husband also has Asperger’s syndrome). I always recommend the use of cannabis products for people who can’t find relief for pain or mental health reasons.

It has really changed my life and my outlook on cannabis products. People always ask me how I cope with a nonverbal autistic 3 year old and a husband with Asperger’s, and I always say ‘Lots of weed!’

I definitely prefer a mixture of any kind of edible and to smoke a bowl. It’s cheaper and I feel the same affects I would feel if I took 2 edibles. It may not be a fix-all, but it truly has made a huge improvement for me personally both mentally and emotionally. I don’t think I would be able to tackle the day-to-day of motherhood and as a house wife if I didn’t use cannabis.

Jackie Greenberg is a cannabis advocate, mother, and wife.